Sunday, July 5, 2009

What's In a Name?

***I have to preface this blog with the following:***
I was at the gas station yesterday, blogging in my head...this blog to be exact. And I got so into the head blogging that I got back into my car, turned the key in the ignition, and drove off...with the gas pump still firmly attached to my vehicle.
I blame Blogger.
So anyway...What's In A Name?
The wedding date has been set. The exciting (smallish...I think) event is going to be held on October 10th on OS's grandfather's farm. That's exactly 3 months and 5 days to do a whole lot of (in Old School's EXACT words) "wedding shit." He expressed this particular opinion of the planning while riding in the car back from the gym one night, when I politely turned toward my adorable fiance and asked him to please refrain from referring our nuptial event as "wedding shit." He obliged. He now calls it "wedding poop." See....compromise already.
Anyway, while I'm trying not to stress out about the big day and I'm moving very quickly on the planning, I do have to admit that this day can't really come quickly enough. Not only will I be marrying my best friend who I laugh with even in the midst of scolding him for saying snarky comments about the amount of wedding planning taking place, but I get to shed something that I have wanted to shed so badly since April of 2008 that I can't even begin to put it into words.
I get a new last name.
Several people have been curious why I didn't take my maiden name back when I got divorced, but it never really occurred to me to do so. I had a child with that last name, and I had high hopes that one day I would remarry and get a brand spankin' new last name. But I have to admit that on more than one occasion I have regretted keeping ex's name and thought about just randomly picking my maiden name back up.
Maybe it's because Ex's last name is kind of different, and every time I say it to someone on the phone the following conversation takes place:
Me: Hi, my name is Sara L*******. That's L-E-F as in Frank, so on and so forth.
and the person on the other end of the phone ALWAYS...did I capitalize ALWAYS? Because they ALWAYS say:
Person on the other end of the phone : L-E-S.....
Me: No, L-E-F as in Frank....
Person on the other end of the phone: So it's not L-E-S?
Me: L-E-F as in Frank...FRANK....or Frustrated.
And after 5 years it has gotten old. I miss the days when saying my last name wasn't followed by a brief, make me want to slit my wrists spelling bee.
Or maybe it's the fact that taking on Ex's last name brought a lot of emotion into my life that wasn't always positive. Pretty much everything associated with that last name, with the exception of E...the one good thing that happened during that union....brings up feelings of disappointment and regret. And while I've done my part to work through the emotions....I'd like to get rid of the name.
So for more reasons than just the obvious marrying my best friend, love of my life, finally got it right stuff....I can't wait for 3 months and 5 days to get here. Because on October 10th, 2009 I will become Sara H***. Short, sweet, and only one way to spell it. So not only do I get a fresh start with someone that God began knitting me to 20 years ago....not only do we laugh a lot...not only can I be myself and do the kind of head in the clouds stuff like drive off with a gas pump still in my vehicle and him still love me....not only is life full of endless possibilities with my teammate firmly planted beside me....but I get a new name....a clean slate.
Trust me when I say that love has never felt so
G-O-O-D.

2 comments:

klynch said...

I know the feeling belive me after 30+ years of spelling my french last name to just have some people murder it even when you have gone thru the spelling of it numerous time the new married name is short but still people can't get the new short irish one.
Really it's not that hard.....

Lora said...

Yeah...it will be nice to not have to spell both names when I finally do get married! lol.

(have I mentioned that I'm reallyreallyreally happy for you?!)