Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Well, crap.

Hello Blog. Remember me? I'm the girl who promised to love you forever and then just one day stopped typing. Sorry about that. I'm back now, because

A. I am a good blogger

B. I miss you.


C. When all this crazy is trapped in my head, life gets ugly. So I figured I'd return and release all the crazy back into the blogdom. Oh yes. You're welcome.

Here it comes...

I think I may have possibly said this before, but apparently it warrants repeating. I have issues. Not just the kind of issues that require the occasional threesome with Ben and Jerry, but REAL issues....the kind that call for serious processing and visits with my inner child and, ugh, honesty.

I wish that I could say that during my extended blog absence life has been all sunshine and roses. I wish I could say that I was the model of joy and happiness. I wish I could say that I had learned how to go all Bewitched on the things that haunt me. But I haven't. Life since marrying OS has had its ups and downs. We've done the expected laughing and crying, but recently found ourselves at a crossroads, probably the first of many, where a decision had to be made. It wasn't painless and it wasn't easy, but at the end of the day we found ourselves taking each other's hand and walking in the same direction. However, during this little journey, I looked at myself in a new light. Unfortunately, it was a cheap dressing room kind of light instead of an upscale salon light....and, well, let's just say it....all my crap was right there for the whole world to see.

The result of this experience has been me realizing that I am long overdue at dealing with my issues. So far in my life, it's been rather convenient to blame my shortcomings on others in my life. It's my parents fault, my sister's fault, my ex husband's fault, or OS's fault. Never mine though....never mine. Sadly, this isn't quite the case. I've realized that I have been experiencing the same problems over and over for years now, and this cross roads experience with OS has made me decide that it's time to tackle the things that haunt me like a ghostbuster with a new proton pack. I have a feeling it's not going to be an easy journey, but LUCKY'll get to read about it...because guess what Blog....

I'm back.


HappyascanB said...

Welcome back! Sorry to hear things have been hectic and trying. . . . thus is life. Hang in there and remember Grace does get Greater in the heartaches and pains!!!

Lora said...

omgosh i've missed you. welcome back!