Wednesday, February 25, 2009

A Hump Day Horn Blowing

Since my recent blog about my Chick-Fil-A addiction, I have been thinking about branching out into a new world of fast food breakfast. So this morning, as I was headed to work, I steered my car into the Micky D's parking lot in search of a new experience.

An Egg McMuffin it is! And yes...throw in a large, thirst-quenching diet coke as well. Let's live dangerously! I spoke my order into the general direction of the computerized window and pulled forward. There were several cars ahead of me, so I sat there and bee-bopped to Britney Spears on the radio as I waited my turn.

In front of me there were two occupying a Silver Toyota and the other in a Blue Honda. In front of them, at the window where you pay for your "balanced breakfast" was a truck. After about 30 seconds the truck pulled forward to the next window. Obviously the next thing to happen would be that Silver Toyota would pull forward. But she didn't. She sat there.

And she sat there. And sat there. And I'll be honest...I was starting to think, "'s your turn. Please move!" (Notice I said "please.") And then it happened.

Blue Honda got PISSED. And when I say PISSED...I mean that Blue Honda THREW HERSELF ON HER HORN WITH ALL OF HER BODY WEIGHT. It scared the hell out of me and sent an entire flock of birds flying out of a nearby tree in fear for their lives. Even Britney Spears stopped singing on the radio to see what the commotion was all about. True story.

So Silver Toyota, who, of course, will now feel like an idiot for the next hour of her life, pulls forward to take care of business. And this is when it occurred to me that there are two kinds of people in the world.

Horn Tooters and Horn Blowers.

Horn Tooters will gently tap on the horn...a polite little "toot toot" (or "beep beep" if their car is foreign) in an effort to say things like, "Excuse me sir or madame, it's your turn," or "Hello there...the light is green. Have a good day!"

Horn Blowers will lay on the horn until you and everyone around you gets the message loud and clear that they think you are, in fact, AN EFFING IDIOT. And their work is not done until a tiny part of you begins to believe it as well.

The entire experience made me miss my chicken burrito and the morning staff at Chick-Fil-A. I bet they are rounding up a search party this very second....

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