Monday, March 9, 2009

A Less Insane Blog About My Evening Constitutional

Today, with the time change and all, I actually got home from work while the sun was still shining. So I immediately ran in the house, put on my tennis shoes, and decided to go for a little jog.

Upon retrieving my ipod from its winter resting place, I realized that it was completely dead. So I set out to enjoy my jog and just take in the scenery. This is really the first time that I've taken a good look around my neighborhood.

This is what I found while on my little jaunt:

1. Two men trying feverishly to load what I think was part of a pool table into the back of a Chevy S-10. While I give them a 10 on effort, they get a 2 on style...as both of their butt cracks were winking at me.

2. A 13 year old boy blowing up an inflatable carport....with his mouth. Child services should be called on the parents of this kid and cited with the inability to provide sufficient air pumping equipment. I was afraid he was going to pass out on the poorly inflated floor.

3. A condom. I didn't get close enough to said condom to determine if someone, in fact, had a hell of a time, or if it was simply used as some kind of balloon animal. Either way...WTF???

4. A house with fake flowers "planted" in their window boxes...to proclaim to the neighborhood that, "Yes, spring is a'comin."

5. On the second lap...the same two men who were loading the truck... except now the pool table is in the middle of the driveway and they are laying on top of it chugging Miller Lite. I guess round two of "Loading Really Big Table onto Teeny Tiny Truck" will seem like a more doable venture if they are a tad more drunk.

For some inexplicable reason, I'm losing confidence in my property value.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

That's awesome. I live around a bunch of retired people, so my neighborhood is a lot less interesting than yours. Wonder where that pool table is going. . .

Amber Lee said...

The old couple who live across the street from me keep fake flowers planted in their yard YEAR ROUND yet mowed a single strip in my yard when I let it get too long last year (when Nath was gone) bc I was making the neighborhood look bad. Nice.

Amy said...

I'm sorry...did you say "inflatable carport?" What in the world?